Magyar Egyház, 1965 (44. évfolyam, 2-12. szám)
1965-06-01 / 6-7. szám
MAGYAR EGYHÁZ 9 had he done so he would have had to commit suicide, a very cheap way out of problems. Loneliness and pigs, nervous breakdown and hunger . . . What a long way, what a price to pay for gaining the world and a colorful life! He was desperate and ill. No companion, no helping hand, no good words. Only pigs, and only wicked, dark memories of his past time, painful dreams at night about his lost home, his family, and his lovely country, with its hills, valleys, slowly moving rivers, and carpets of colored leaves. And then he came to his senses. Previously he had tried to defend himself, to find some self-justification for his deeds. But when he came to himself, he had to cry aloud. Rodin’s famous sculpture of the prodigal son shows him as a naked, bony, thin figure in a convulsion of desperation, with arms outstretched, looking upwards. When he cried aloud, he was admittng his guilt and his own sins. There was no self-justification then, but confession about what a bad, sinful man he was. I don’t deserve to be called your son anymore. The conclusion of his “coming to himself” and his own personal drama is ended in this monologue. And he arose and came to his father. “I am not worthy to be called your son,” and yet, he got up and went to his father. What a paradoxical situation: to go to his father because he was no more worthy to be his son! He would make a new start. But a lot of people remembered him: this fellow had had a considerable amount of money, he had come to our region with big ideas, hadn’t he? — In the faces of his old friends his sins were coming before him, the lost occasions of good services for God. The road is full of thorns not only to Calvary but from Calvary. But, coming back from Calvary also means to meet sins as forgiven sins, sins without strength and power. It often happens that, no matter how mothers and fathers are neglected and hurt by their children will somehow give the sign of their continuing love. The father in our story gave such a sign. But when he was a great way off, his father saw him. Bewildered and unhappy people who have fallen far from God, are not able to endure goodness, unselfish love, and forgiveness offered without condition. To be loved after the punishment is the natural order of life and the world. But to be loved in the midst of one’s sins, with nothing required in return, that love is unbearable. When the lost son was still some distance off, his father ran and fell on his neck, and kissed him. This is the attitude that hurts. To be loved without words, arguments, recriminations breaks down all barriers. A pastor has to make it clear for himself that his flock is a comunity of people who were or are prodigal sons, including himself. I made my journey on the freeways of foreign countries, as the young man in our story did. I took the same advantages of God and men, and I had to collect the same bad memories and wounds that our young friend got. But I confess honestly that without those wounds which have been caused mostly by myself since I left the old country, I could not preach the forgiveness and mercy of our Father with authority. I had to learn the hard way for beeing ready to recommend it, to talk about it. The scope, the message of every sermon must be: you are a prodigal son who went to a distant country, the country of sin, but... And this “but” means everything to you: understanding, love, grace, eternal life in and by Jesus Christ. Without having experienced the fact of this “but,” the grace of the Father, I would be unable to convince you that the same can happen to you also. Without having faced the consequences of my own stupidity in the school of God, I would not be able to see any congregation as a gathering of living human beings hurt by life, crying for the cure of their wounded hearts, but only as cases and theological objects. Coming up from the depth and found by the grace, I can now touch the hidden and painful problems of my fellow men with compassion because I learned to know the chemistry of my own heart and the consequences of my own disobedience. Consequently, I can see myself not as an exceptional, dignified person with specific rank and high position as a minister, but as a simple sinner who got a pardon by the Father through Jesus’ blood. I am not above the heads of the members of my sophisticated flock in Los Angeles, but during the sermon I too, am sitting somewhere in one of the back seats in the church listening to the Word about what a merciful, warm-hearted Father we have. The world has changed a lot. Today we have to preach a realistic Gospel to the people, whose structure of life is more complex than our father’s was. Pious words, ecclesiastical formulas, cheap generalizations mean nothing anymore, and I am glad to learn it. It is just time for Christian candor. People, who live in anguish, fear, frustration, and are wrecked by psychological causes and tragedies, turn away from the church. The competition — especially here in America — is so big that the church has to be up to date and progressive, has to face life in reality, and has to accept the cruel facts of our age as a challenge. Fifty years ago a church could be a kind of club, the community of immigrants who had struggled with the strange new world language. But today the situation is different. The church must be a church and nothing else. The clubs do their own ... and well. The church has to do her own, and well, if she wants to fulfill her mission, testifying. It is a big deal to hold meetings and dance parties, to come together at picnics and serve goulash and fine Hungarian cookies, but the time for these is over. The center of the church must be the Word of God. All other activities in and around the church can be only a secondary attraction. When the life of a congregation no longer revolves around the act of worship, we lose our identity as a Christian community! Why are you here and now? To maintain a conventional, solemn attitude? To pay honor to your pastor? To meet friends? Or did you come because of the keen desire to hear the Voice of the Lord of Hosts? If you came for this reason, your attitude is right. If you came because you are involved in unsolved problems and if you are fed up with the hazardous, cruel phenomenon named life: you came to the right place. The church exists just for such people who yearn for order in their hearts. Confront yourself now with God! Not with the theoretical, abstract Supreme Being and the “sweet Jesus,” but our Father in heaven who became flesh in His only begotten Son and on the cross became the Prodigal Son of all prodigal sons of the world. What was the message of the story of the young man who went to a far country? Don’t be afraid to turn and go back and to make a new start! It isn’t necessary for your feelings and your desire to be put well-balanced into words. Our Father knows the state of your heart and He understands. And the answer for you, too, will be the same, the father said to his elder son: Thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found.
