Amerikai Magyar Hírlap, 2006 (18. évfolyam, 1-50. szám)
2006-01-01 / 1. szám
IVAN HECZEY Double or Nothing After the 11 o’clock news, Mike turned off the TV. He was still musing about what the commentator had said about the war with Iraq. The situation was flammable, with U.S. bombs falling on Baghdad on the order of our President, but at least Israel was not, for the moment, getting involved. For the moment. And what if the desperate, fanatical Goliath attacks the innocent citizens with chemical weapons? Is David going to defend his people with a nuclear slingshot? * That day, Mike decided he was not going to stick around to see how this war ends. He had lived a full life. He had kissed the petulant lips of many young girls before kissing became such a deadly pastime, while other adolescents were still begging for ice cream on the way to the movies. Mike decided he was going to disappear in a classy, sophisticated manner, smiling inwardly at his fantastic idea. All of his worldly possessions - six crisp hundred-dollar bills - were hiding in his wallet. He has got no one left - not even a dog or a cat. He had taken a leave of absence until the first of the month. „I’ll be long gone by the first,” he thought and picked up the phone to dial. * Mike arrived in Las Vegas in about four-and-a-half hours. Although he was driving well above the speed limit, there was no sign of a police car. “To be sure, they aren’t stopping me now,” Mike said to his image in the mirror, remembering the industrious Barstow sheriff he was unable to talk out of giving him a ticket the last time. In the hotel, nobody was surprised to see him come in with only an overnight bag. (They wouldn’t even have noticed if he had arrived with sixteen suitcases”) The sleepy bellboy was glad to earn five bucks at dawn without having to carry anything - lucky money he could bet with in another casino on the way home. The room clerk gave him a suite, as always. He was welcomed by a well-stocked bar, a huge basket of fresh fruit, and a note from one of the casino managers he had occasionally rewarded with a box of cigars... Which show would he like to see? Reserve a table for two? Would he like „something else”? Mike had never taken advantage of this privilege usually bestowed only on the „high rollers”. He could always find a pretty secretary in Los Angeles who was happy to spend a couple of days with him in Vegas. Now, for the first time, Mike had arrived alone. Of course, no one guessed that this would be his last time! * Mike slept until noon. Ordering a light meal from Room Service, he had them set the table on the balcony overlooking the tennis court. In the old days, Mike often played at dawn before the heat became unbearable, although now, in February, the weather was also quite pleasant during the day. A skillful player, Mike liked to flaunt his expertise on the court with the vanity of a man over fifty who knows he looks only forty-five. Well, he would certainly not play tennis at dawn again! Mike decided he would sit on the balcony once more - tomorrow - and drink a bottle of champagne to wash down the twenty sleeping pills waiting in his bag. * The manager accompanied Mike across the elaborate, spacious casino. Nothing big was DUNA Travel 8530 Holloway Dr. #102 W. Hollywood, CA 90069 SPECIÁLIS ÁR LAX-BUD-LAX $439.+TX.J Információért hívják ZSUZSÁT TEL: (310) 652-5294 FAX: (310) 652-5287 1-888-532-0168 going on anywhere. There was some movement at one of the roulette tables where a few excited old ladies were placing tokens here and there. Two croupiers were yawning during the small betting. They awoke with a start when Mike called to them out of the blue: „Five hundred dollars on the red, please!” He merely sensed the appreciative glances as they acknowledged the bet beside him while he lit a cigarette. The croupier placed a small white token on the red field. The only sound in the suddenly deafening silence was the bouncing of the ivory ball. Then the impassive voice of the croupier as he announced, looking at the already motionless wheel: „Nine, red...” The white token was replaced by five brown ones, each worth a hundred dollars. The table was cleared with the speed of lightning; all the players were paid at once. Looking at Mike, the croupier started the ball rolling... rolling... rolling. Mike simply nodded, meaning the bet remained. On the spur of the moment, Mike asked the manager for reservations to the Sinatra show. With his back turned towards the HUMOR NEW CONVERSION TABLE Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter? = Eskimo Pi 2000 pounds of Chinese soup? = Won ton 1 millionth of a mouthwash? = 1 microscope Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement? = 1 bananosecond Weight an evangelist carries with God? = 1 billigram Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour? = Knotfurlong 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone? = 1 Rod Serling Half of a large intestine? ! = 1 semicolon 1,000,000 aches? = 1 megahurtz Basic unit of laryngitis? = 1 hoarsepower Shortest distance between two jokes? = A straight line 453.6 graham crackers? = 1 pound cake 1 million-million microphones? = 1 megaphone 52 cards? = 1 decacards 1 kilogram of falling figs? = 1 Fig Newton 1000 milliliters of wet socks? = 1 literhosen 1 millionth of a fish? = 1 microfiche 10 rations? = 1 decoration 2 monograms? = 1 diagram 25. 4 nickels? = 2 paradigms 27. 100 Senators? = Not 1 decision (from Leslie Eloed) table, he heard the croupier announce the number 23 red had won! * In the center of the room, cordoned off by a red velvet rope, impeccably-attired managers were walking up and down, signing credits, keeping an eye on the games, reverently addressing the regular gamblers with large credits by their last names. Mike’s winnings were credited to his account. He could lose ten thousand dollars wjthout even dipping into his pocket! All he had to do was sign his name! That’s eleven thousand now! Well, at least he won’t get bored until dawn... Mike thanked the returning manager for his efforts, graciously acknowledging that he would be watching the Sinatra Show as a guest of the house. He would just walk past the simple mortals who had been waiting for hours to get in, give his name to the forbidding maitre d’, and pay twice as much in tips for a good table than his bill would be. Then, after the show, he would sit down at the baccarat table and carelessly play until his last copper penny is gone. Are they going to resent it? Possibly, but what can they do? Not give him a funeral? * By that evening, Mike had won six thousand dollars playing Black Jack. He never won less than a hundred on any bet, and he bet three thousand before leaving the table. At midnight, he had them open a bottle of champagne to celebrate his birthday. Mike couldn’t have felt better if Sinatra himself had personally come to wish him Happy Birthday! As he arrived at the baccarat table, the bank was offering seven thousand. „I’ll hold it,” Mike said in a whisper. The dealer stopped at seven and he got a red number nine on two figures! Who knows? Maybe everything will turn out all right... * By dawn, Mike was back in Los Angeles. He had tossed the bag - sleeping pills and all - out the window somewhere between Barstow and Victorville. ■■■■ Translated by Susan Jancso, 1997 The English Page of the Hírlap can serve as a bridge between the non-Hungarian-speaking members of the family and the community. Use it to bring people together! Subscribe to the Hírlap! Advertise your business in the Hírlap! If you have any questions or suggestions, please call (323) 463-6376 Integrated classes Throughout history, racism has frequently been dressed up in religious and scientific arguments. Believers in polygenesis, amongst them Voltaire, trying to disprove the bible, claimed that God had created the various human ‘races’ separately, meaning that they should not mix. Apartheid’s practical aspects were developed by the professors of the socio-psychology department at Stellenbosch University in South Africa. There are no racial persecution laws in Hungary nowadays, and there are no governments that want to introduce them. Apart from a few extremists, there are no figures in public life who call for the races to be separated. Somewhat absurdly, even the racists themselves take offense at being labeled with this epithet. But now, and especially since a public foundation won a precedent-setting judgement against Miskolc City Council, there is increasingly talk of informal segregation or soft apartheid in Hungary. They mean that Hungarian primary education separates majority and Roma students. Before lining up behind whichever viewpoint it is that appeals to our political sympathies, it may be worth acknowledging a few facts. There is no doubt that there are serious segregating tendencies in the Hungarian school system. But prejudice is only one of several causes of this - especially given that Hungary’s Roma problem is very different from almost all other countries’ minority problems. Whether it’s Csángos or Catalans - most European minorities are demanding what we consider unjust in the case of the Roma - separate classes, even separate schools. This alone shows that we should consider it as more than a purely ethnic question. The major complaint is that Roma children, because of prejudice, are placed in special needs classes. Now racism may well be a factor in this, but not the only one. Nobody denies that there is a gulf in standard of living between Roma and the majority. Indicators of the Roma citizens’ income, education, nutritional and health levels are an order of magnitude below those of the majority. And if this is the case, then it is reasonable to say without any prejudice that a malnourished Roma child, whose illiterate parents have not even completed secondary school, will clearly do worse than his well-fed classmate whose parents did stay on until 18. You have to catch up before you start to compete. Prejudice is responsible for many bad things, but it can’t be the excuse for everything. Some in the current government think positive discrimination is the answer. Those playing catch-up in special needs classes should be bumped up into the normal classes. But this only damages the people it’s meant to help. This doesn’t help the disadvantaged to catch up, it just reduces the average to their level. Which gives racist tongues new arguments, since they are always emphasising how the inferiority of the Roma prevents them from reaching the level of the ’whites’. I'nyiish puyv If * § f § £ W á Eß mii MM St á MMMFB WL f 0 § í M á WM W JH WB , t » m ür m 83 M J H 3B § mar £ $S? sss m M M Js 8 áfát M sgs Mis» Január 1, 2006 ^
