William Penn Life, 2009 (44. évfolyam, 1-12. szám)
2009-09-01 / 9. szám
HealthPage Preparing for the By planning ahead of time, you can ensure your wishes are followed and soften the pain of loss for your loved ones The following is excerpted from the booklet: "End of Life: Helping with Comfort and Care" published by the National Institute on Aging At the end of life, each story is different. Death comes suddenly, or a person lingers, gradually failing. For some older people, the body weakens while the mind stays alert. Others remain physically strong, and cognitive losses take a huge toll. But for everyone, death is inevitable, and each loss is personally felt by those close to the one who has died. End-of-life care is the term used to describe the support and medical care given during the time surrounding death. Such care does not happen just in the moments before breathing finally stops and a heart ceases to beat. An older person is often living, and dying, with one or more chronic illnesses and needs a lot of care for days, weeks and sometimes even months. When a doctor says something like, "I'm afraid the news is not good. There are no other treatments for us to try. I'm sorry," it may close the door to the possibility of a cure, but it does not end the need for medical support. Nor does it end the involvement of family and friends. There are many places and a variety of ways to provide care for an older person who is dying. Such care often involves a team. If you are reading this, then you might be part of such a team. Because of advances in medicine, each of us, as well as our families and friends, may face many decisions about the dying process. As hard as it might be to face the idea of your own death, you might take time to consider how your individual values relate to your idea of a good death. By deciding what end-of-life care best suits your needs when you are healthy, you can help those close to you make the right choices when the time comes. This not only respects your values, but also allows those closest to you the comfort of feeling as though they can be helpful. There are several ways to make sure others know the kind of care you want when dying. Talking About End-of-Life Wishes The simplest, but not always the easiest, way is to talk about end-of-life care before an illness. Discussing your thoughts, values, and desires will help people who are close to you to know what end-of-life care you want. For We cannot banish dangers, but we can banish fears. We must not demean life by standing in awe of death.- David Sarnoff example, you could discuss how you feel about using life-prolonging measures or where you would like to be cared for. For some people, it makes sense to bring this up at a small family gathering. Others may find that telling their family they have made a will (or updated an existing one) provides an opportunity to bring up this subject with other family members. Doctors should be told about these wishes as well. As hard as it might be to talk about your end-of-life wishes, knowing your preferences ahead of time can make decision making easier for your family. You may also have some comfort knowing that your family can choose what you want. On the other hand, if your parents are aging and you are concerned about what they want, you might introduce the subject. You can try to explain that having this conversation will help you care for them and do what they want. You might start by talking about what you think their values are, instead of talking about specific treatments. Try saying something like, "when Uncle Walt had a stroke and died, I thought you seemed upset that his kids wanted to put him on a respirator." Or, "I've always wondered why Grandpa didn't die at home. Do you know?" Encourage your parents to share the type of care they would choose to have at the end of life, rather than what they don't want. There is no right or wrong plan, only what they would like. If they are reluctant to have this conversation, don't force it, but try to bring it up again at a later time. 6 William Penn Life, September 2009
