Fraternity-Testvériség, 2007 (85. évfolyam, 1-3. szám)
2007-04-01 / 2. szám
Report of the Secretary—Treasurer Unfortunately, many death certificates cross my desk during my regular working day. It is the basic document we work with when processing a death claim. Death is a difficult topic for most people, including me, to discuss and prepare for but 1 know the necessity of proper preparation and correct handling of one’s affairs. 1 am most concerned about the family of the deceased and whether or not they make the right decisions. For a grieving person, the ordeal can be overwhelming, especially if one is unprepared for the event. But the trauma of losing a loved one can be somewhat lessened if the following is done while the person is still alive: a. Prepare a will b. Update all legal and financial papers c. Make funeral arrangements. d. Hold assets jointly, if possible e. Inform a trusted person of one’s intentions. When a loved one dies, you may need a lawyer, especially if the estate needs to be probated, ily lawyer, calling the local bar association’s referral service is one way to find a qualified attorney. Of course, you need to locate all important documents. Look for life insurance records, bankbooks, securities certificates, real estate deeds, recent income tax returns, social security number, birth and marriage certificates, military discharge papers, Department of Veterans Affairs claim number, automobile registration, etc. After organizing the important papers, you will need to obtain many copies of the death certificate because a photocopy will not suffice since it does not have the raised registrar’s seal to make it valid. Often the funeral director can obtain the required death certificates, but order more than you think you will need as requests continue long after you think you’ve met all possibilities for their use. With the required death certificate, you should contact HRFA’s Home Office to establish proof of a claim if you are the named beneficiary. Next, if the deceased was covered by Social Security, you may be eligible for a lump-sum death benefit which is usually paid to the surviving spouse. If you do not apply for Social Security benefits, you will not get them because they are not offered automatically. If the deceased was a veteran, you should contact the nearest U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs (DVA) to pay the funeral benefits. They will also provide for an American flag for the casket and burial in any national cemetery. You can ask the funeral director to alert the DVA to send you the claims fonn. Although most funeral directors are ethical, some unfair trade practices can happen such as unnecessary embalming, overcharging for services, etc. One recourse is to preplan the funeral and consider life insurance to fund your funeral. One last word of caution about dealing with grief, based on my own personal experience and the many survivors I’ve dealt with over the years in processing death claims. Death is one of the greatest crises a person will face. The resulting grief may be so overwhelming that it clouds your normally good judgment and ability to handle your own affairs. Give yourself plenty of time to adjust to these trying circumstances. Some psychologists even warn against making major decisions about moving to a new location, getting rid of possessions, and buying or selling property for up to two years after a loved one dies. Don’t, and I emphasize, do not, make any major decisions immediately after a loved one’s funeral. Postpone such life-altering decisions until such time as you can make them without emotional duress and the added components of grief, depression, regret, and family advice, much of it unsolicited but well-meaning. You have to decide what’s right for you in light of your own future, life-style, and intentions. As a member of a fraternal organization, you may rely on others you trust to help you through these trying times. Canadian Actor and Toronto Blue Jays Scout Sean McCann credits his Canadian fraternal AFBS with the first and most reliable support system that his family turned to upon his own heart attack and the loss of his wife’s parents. Remember that your HRFA Home Office staff is also ready to assist you. Please seek us out and we will try to help you to the best of our ability. Know that you are not alone and that you are not the first and only person to go through this event. Other HRFA members have experienced such devastating loss and we ourselves know the importance of giving correct advice and solace in this most difficult time. Fraternally yours, Leslie László Megyeri If you don’t have a fam4 Fraternity - Testvériség / Summer 2007
