Amerikai Magyar Szó, 1986. július-december (40. évfolyam, 27-49. szám)
1986-08-28 / 32. szám
Thursday, Aug. 28. 1986. AMERIKAI MAGYAR SZO 7. Beside Hotel Hilton in Budapest there is a carriage - drawn by two horses - and before the main entrance a white car decorated with flowers. The onlooker is not entirely mistaken in thinking that preparations for a wedding are under way. This time, however, the happy young couple will not be really wed, they will vow eternal faith to each other only as the main characters of the Wedding 1986 program series. "From getting to know each other to settling down" - this was the theme of the exhibition combined with a fashion show and counseling. All this was organized to help those who are alone, with no companion or partner. Their number is somewhere around 100,000 in Hungary. A small stand decorated with the amblem of "Levélpressz" - the drawing of a boy and a girl kissing within a heart - could be found at the exhibition, run by a group of people who deal with computerized companion finding. I asked the head of the group, Gyula Tóth and his colleague, Tibor Gyórfi about their work. "The idea that we should somehow help those who are alone and lonely first came to my mind in 1983," said Gyula Tóth. "All the statistical data showed that the number of divorces is increasing while the number of marriages is decreasing It is not easy to start a new relationship, especially for those who have had one bad experience. Those who have no opportunity to get acquainted have an especially hard time. As time passes a lonely person will become withdrawn, unsure of himself, at times suspicious. He needs help that is dependable and discreet. I thought I would try to aid them in some way. Our 'partner seeking' office was not the first one of its kind. What we offer that is new is that we do not insist on the client coming to us personally. We reach our clients by way of letter." "How did those interested find out about the existence of Levélpressz?" "We originally started to work on a small scale. We ourselves typed the first notice. During a period of four months, however, we received only two or three 'applications'. After getting over the first disappointment, we tried to figure out where we had gone wrong. In the end we concluded that notices and information sheets should be printed, that we must advertise ourselves in as many papers and magazines as possible." "And did these ads bring any results?" "More and more people asked us to send them our free information bulletin and information sheet," said Tibor Györfi. "By the end of 1985, when we did a summing up of our work, almost 4,000 people had made use of our service." "We work with the aid of a computer. With its help we guarantee a minimum of four, but usually five partners to those who have paid the commission fee. Naturally, at first it was not easy - the less data we had at our disposal, the harder it was to match applicants. Modern technique makes it possible for us to find and give the address of all those whose data are stored -v in the computer, and who fit the given expectations. The number of successful 'cases' has increased. According to our statistics, the number of good relationships, marriages that result from these acquaintances is over 1,000. And these are only the ones that we know about, because they send us . a thank-you note, they share their happiness with us. At times we even receive a wedding invitation - our place is always among the most important guests. Thus, we are convinced that what we do is useful, in spite of what the official statistic show. Our clients always know what stage they are at in the whole process, whether we have sent out their name and address to someone. Although we send out the data of only five people to each applicant, we keep everyone on file - even if we were unsuccessful at first try - in the hope that we can offer their name to someone at a later date. In cases like this we always notify everyone concerned - people like to feel that someone cares." "I believe that you also have disabled people as clients." "Yes, at present we have a few hundred applicants. They are more sensitive than healthy people, it is harder for them to Illustration: István Imre Jr. make friends. During the past months we have advertised more in their circles, we have offered our help, and it appears that our efforts are not entirely unsuccessful." "Do you offer any other services?" "Since April of 1985 we have been organizing regular programs. Our experience is that there is a need for the opportunity and possibility to meet others personally. Each week we organize an evening of dancing and music in one of the restaurants in Budapest. At these we also give a small show. On namedays and New Year's Eve we hold balls. Since the first of May, each Saturday, those who are looking for partners can go on a boat trip on the Danube. I could also mention the 'get-acquainted' night we organize together with the West German Freizeit office. This came about as a result of our good international ties. At present we have clients from 16 countries - four continents - including Australia, Canada and the USA. In fact, we know that there have been marriages as a result of our efforts." "Who are the people who come to you?" "Loneliness, partner seeking is not tied to age, although we have placed the upper limit at 60. This was done, however, to ensure that we can offer the appropriate number of partners. To be honest, we do not always insist on this age limit. At present our oldest client is 73 years old, a man, and the youngest is an 11-year-old boy, who would like a '12-year-old girl friend, but she can also be 20'. Joking aside, there are more women than man applicants. Each month over 100 people look us up; many of the women have a university degree. They have the lowest chance for making friends. In contrast, those men who, although they have a university degree, do not insist that the woman have one too, can choose from among hundreds." A. B. I VI^ll AINT) I THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE SUPPLEMENT OF THE J MAGYAR SZÓ j Write-You Mav Find a Partner
