Verhovayak Lapja, 1940. július-december (23. évfolyam, 27-52. szám)

1940-07-25 / 30. szám

July 25, 1940 Page T DOUBLE FEATUR by SYLVIA HORVATH E Chicago, Illinois, July 18, ’40 Verhovayak Lapja CONCERNING REVOLVING DOORS "My dear Miss Horvath, “Doubtless you’ve spent recent nights at the radio trying to tune out what sounded like your congress­man giving an impassioned reading from the telephone registry during a hectic Verhovay baseball game. Since you live in Chicago you must have known the Democratic national conven­tion was running the gamut of wave lengths on your wireless, for you had only to shut it down and move to an open window, to hear the bellowing and hollering drift over on the clear night air from the Chicago Sta­dium, just a few miles away. The Democratic machine is pretty noisy of course, but don’t worry about its break­ing down. Although it’s been running on and off since Andy Jackson’s day, its go­ing stronger than ever to­day.” I can understand how the Democratic machine is still, after more than a hundred years, functioning so nicely. Just the other morning I saw parts of the machine staggering about in our downtown* district, and wheeyoo they were well oiled, to say the very least. "Why do I remark on the appalling efficiency of the Democratic party? Well, as a Republican, I don’t relish making this admission but the Democratic program is more explicit and under­standable to the average roter who goes to the polls come November than that bizarre creation, pieced to­gether ty ‘the other parly’ at the Philadelphia conven­tion.” The women delegates, Elemer (dear), monopolized the "bizarre creations’’. At the Democratic doings, and moreover, wore them on their pretty heads like as ii they were hats. Just think, someone ties up the scat­tered products of a warped mind with a ribbon and sells off the result to the feminine public as the very latest thing in imilinery. “You notice perhaps that there was something of an uproar among the Demo­crats when someone brought up the issue of equal rights under the Constitution for women. None of the people I’ve questioned about this matter seem to have a clear idea of what equal rights signifies in this instance. Most everybody thought wo­men have more than that, and why wasn’t something being done for the men? "But seriously, Mrs. F, D. R. and many women are very much against this equality. And those who are for it at the present time are not known to be parti­cularly concerned over the welfare of the woiking goil. I suspect that equal rights really mean equal liabilities that, if imposed on our wo­mankind, would invalidate labor legislation made for their special benefit and protection, and would put them at a grave disadvan­tage with relation to their employers in industry. -You are a working girl, Miss Hor­vath, or should be. What iave you to say about this?” I don’t know, Mr. Hary (dear), and I’m not sure that I care as much as I should. Right now, my mind is occupied with all kinds of thoughts that don’t in any way pertain to the subject you are dwelling upon. There’s the awful news of the latest invasion by the Nazis upon the rights of a free people. In France these days the girls are strictly forbidden to paint their fin­ger nails, to use rouge and mascara and lipstick .... And oh yes, (dear), I notice you’ve been out of your stride lately. I think you’ve been troubled with an affec­tion, known as Violet Hayes. Symptoms: a feeling of full­ness about the heart, and a marked loss af appetite. Even the great Huzianyi seems to have succumbed, since he has met her. Speak­ing about Huzianyi, I have it from an unimpeachable source that while in secret conclave at midnight with intimates, he, like the epi­cure that he is, delights in a dish of — graham crackers and milk . . . “Whatever the outcome over “equal rights” will be I can only guess that for the girls or women who must work in a factory, and I believe that there are many in the Ver­hovay, ‘Equal rights’ should be as welcomed as a touch of the bubonic plague. Well, all I know is what I read in the Ver­hovay. The only thing clear to me at the outset was that a surprising ma­jority of the delegates at the convention were plug­ging for a dark horse by name of Roosevelt. Elemer Hary.” (Editor’s Note: The ques­tion of who should go first —the man or the woman— when entering a revolving door, is one that has both­ered many of us. The dis­cussion below should solve the mystery. Verhovay gal­lants will be glad to read this solution of the crux that has so often confound­ed them.) There has been much dis­cussion as to the etiquette of the revolving door. When a man accompanied by a wo­man is about to be revolved in it, which should go first? Some think the man should precede the woman, furnish­ing the motive power, while she follows idly in the next compartment. Others hold that the rule “Ladies first” can have no exception; therefore the man must stand aside and let the fe­male of the species do the rough work of starting the door’s revolution while the man, coming after, keeps it going and stops it at the right moment. “Starting something” is perhaps of all pastimes in the world the one most po­pular with the sex we are accustomed to call the gentle sex; one might almost say that “starting something” is Woman’s prerogative; on the other hand there is nothing on earth so abhorrent to that same gentle sex as the thing that is called consistency; and tho she may be perfectly charmed to start a revolu­tion in South America, or wear silk pajamas, or be a suffragist, or rear children, it does not follow that she will take kindly to the idea of starting the revolution of a revolving door. As for the rule "Ladies first,” its application to the etiquette of doors is general­ly purely a matter of geo­graphy. In some European countries it is the custom, when entering a room, for the man to precede the wo­man, and if it be a closed street or office door, the man opens the door and fol­lows it inward, then holds the door open while the wo­man passes in. If the door opens outward the woman naturally enters first, since her companion must remain outside to hold the door open.. The American rule compel­ling the woman to precede her escort when entering a room or building doubtless originated with our ances­tor the cave man. On returning to his “apart ment” with his wife after a hunting expedition, Mr. Hairy K. Stoneaxe would say with persuasive neolithic smile (and gentle shove), “After you, my dear,” be­ing rewarded for his polite­ness by advance information as to whether there were Megathriums or Loxolo­­phodons, or an ambuscade of jealous rivals lurking in the darkness of his stone­­upholstered sitting room. By all means let the lady go first; by so doing we pay the homage that is due to her sex and even tho there are no Megathriums or Loxolophodons in these days —there may be burglars! Only in the case of a door that must be opened inward would I suggest an amend­ment. What more lament­able sight than that of a gentle lady squeezing pre­cariously thru a half-opened door while her escort, de­termined that tho they both perish in the attempt, she shall go first, reaches awk­wardly past her shoulder in the frantic endeavor to push back the heavy self-closing door, while at the same time contorting the rest of his person into the smallest pos­sible compass that she may have room to pass without disaster to her ninety dollar hat, not to speak of her elbows and shins. How much happier—and happiness is the mainspring of etiquette—they would be —this same pair—if (with a possible “allow me” to calm her fears) the escort should push boldly the door to its widest openness and hold­ing it thus with one hand behind his back, with the other press his already re­moved hat against his heart, as the lady grateful and un­ruffled sweeps majestically by­—Oliver Herford. * * * DISCUSSION The revolving door seems to be a never failing source of humor, especiallly the humor which arises from loss of dignity. It is diffi­cult to be pompous in a revolving door, for it is either moving too slowly, when one must push fatigu­­ingly as he takes mincing steps in the narrow space provided, or else it is whirl­ing dangerously, spewing forth into street or foyer at a pace which denies all grace of movement. The comic magazines and the moving pictures have made full use of the revolving door as a source of humor, fully aware of the fact that few of us can approach a revolving door without a slight feeling of apprehension as we enter and a sigh of relief if we have passed thru it safely.--------------O-------------­BRANCH 366 TO HOLD ANNUAL PICNIC CLEVELAND, OHIO The Annual Picnic of Branch 366, Cleveland, Ohio, will be held on Sunday, July 28, at Kalo’s farm, Forbes Road, Bedford, Ohio. The program will be at­tractively varied to suit the picnicker. There will be gate prizes, races, contests, a ball game between the Verhovays and the Jesters at 2 p. m., several kinds of games, etc. The music will be fur­nished by the Primrose Or­chestra. Free transportation to the picnic grounds w'ill be avail­able. To get to the grounds follow Ohio Route 8 or 14 to Forbes Road; then go north on Forbes Road and watch for signs giving further di­rections. The admission to the An­nual Picnic is 30c. Everyone is invited to at­tend this grand day spon­sored by Cleveland’s Branch 366. MOONLIGHT EXCURSION on the Steamer "SENATOR' FRIDAY. AUGUST 16 Sponsored by BRANCH 430 — HOMESTEAD, PA. Leave Stanwix Street Dock 8:45 P. M. (At Duquesne Way) Pittsburgh, Pa. Fare: At Steamer 75c, if purchased in advance 60c. Exhilarating Swing Music by FATE MARABLE, Wizard of the Ivories, and his 11 “ORIGINAL COTTON PICKERS” GET YOUR TICKETS NOW FROM A MEMBER OR OFFICERS OF BRANCH 430.

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