Verhovayak Lapja, 1940. július-december (23. évfolyam, 27-52. szám)

1940-11-28 / 48. szám

$­Page 12 Verhovayak Lapja November 28, 1940 THE: HUMOROUS VEIN: Suggested Course Tired after a hard day, a distinguished CongTessman in Washington handed the menu back to the waiter and Kaid: “Just bring me a good meal.” A good meal was served and the Congressman gave the waiter a generous tip. “Thank yo’, suh,” the waiter said. “And if yo’ got any frien’s what can’t read, yo»’ jus, send ’em to me, suh!” * * * Ice Breaker Slippery ice—very thin; Pretty girl—tumbled in. Saw a fellow on the bank; Gave a shriek—then she sank. Boy on hand—heard her shout; Jumped right in—pulled her out. Now he’s hers—very nice, But she had to break the ice! * * ♦ The fond mother wrote to her son, who was on military service: “I hope that you have now learned to get up punctually every morning, so that you do not keep the whole bat­talion waiting for break­fast.” * * * “There was a little lawyer man, Who gently smiled as he began Her dear husband’s will to scan. And, thinking of his coming fee, He said to her quite tenderly: ‘You have a nice fat legacy.’ Next morning as he lay in bed, With plasters on his broken head, He wondered what he had said.” —SoCanSan Piper. * * * It seems that the gate broke down between heaven and hell. St. Peter appeared at the broken part of the gate and called out to the devil: “Hey, Satan! It’s your turn to fix it this time.” “Sorry,” replied the boss of the land beyond the styx. “My men are too busy to worry about fixing a mere gate.” “Well, then,” scowled St. Peter, “I’ll have to sue you for breaking our agreement.” “Oh, yeah!” retorted the Devil. “Where are you going to get a lawyer?”—Just for Fun. ♦ * * An Open Case A negro woman was stand­ing on the street watching a circus parade. One of the pickaninnies looked up and said: “Mam­my, yo’ mouf’s open.” To which she replied sternly: “Yas, I know it. I done left it open mahself.” * * * Salesman: “I represent the Mountain Wool Com­pany, ma’am. Would you be interested in some coarse yarns?” She: “Gosh, yes! Tell me a couple.”—San Jesters. * * * “I won’t get married until I find a girl like grandpa married.” “Huh! They don’t make them like that these days.” “That’s funny. He only married her yesterday.”— Loyalty Group. Missed His Schooling Pa: “It’s a terrible thing. Í sold my car and mortgaged my house and land, just to send my son to the univer­sity. And all he does there is smoke, dance and take girls out to parties.” Neighbor: “Oh, so you’re regretting it, eh?” Pa: “You’re dern tooting. I should have gone myself!” Jumping Jupiter Mr. Kangaroo: “Susie, where’s the baby?”­­Mrs. Kangaroo: “Good heavens! My pocket’s been picked!” LITTLE JULIUS SNEEZER SOUNO HAN- bo YOU KNOW I THAT I'M ONÉ OP THf | greatest cornet , I FLAYERS iN 7«*» COUNTRY' r T—J BY BAKER STARS ON PARADE By TONI ROSSETT 'ÜXiwrtlwnujhen WALLACE BEERY/ RAN AWAY FROM HOME WHEN HE WAS A YOUTH AND JOINED UP WITH A CIRCUS AND BECAME A WATER CARRIER FOR. THE ELEPHANTS!! IN THE VEAR 1130 WAS JUST ANOTHER CLAP­­$ CTICR ACTOR. Here is bill, in A TYPICAL pose, tare w FROM A SCENE IN m ACT!! U/ITH OMW£ Juice!!

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